PHOTO: DAVIS AYER
Desire is a primitive, primal force that lives within our cells that is always guiding us towards that which we long for and typically something that we need as a form of nourishment - a constant calling out waiting to be heard and longing to be fulfilled.
But unfortunately - most of us have an unhealthy relationship with desire.
We hide it, suppress it, pretend that it isn’t there. Or we feel it but numb it. Or we starve ourselves and hold it in and bottle it up until we can’t take it any longer and then like a coke bottle, we explode and act out in indulgence and addiction in order to fill the void of longing that we’ve denied ourselves for so long.
This denial and suppression not only keeps us from living lives of joy and presence and excitement but it keeps us from FEELING GOOD and living the life we are meant to live.
Because ultimately - you DO deserve everything you desire - and the fact that you don’t think you don’t only keeps you living a small life, detached from your full purpose and potential.
You are this beautiful woman FULL OF POTENTIAL that is just waiting to be expressed … and that expression is the reason you are here. It’s the reason you are on the planet and it’s the reason you are who you are.
But you think you aren't worth it or that others won't understand, so you keep playing small and denying yourself of your desires.
And you aren't alone, most of us deny our desires out of self sacrifice or fear - thinking that we should keep them under lock and key because we'll be judged or accused of being "selfish" - but the opposite is actually true. When we don’t show up fully for ourselves first - there is no way we can show up fully for others. By living a fully embodied life from a place of desire, we are actually able to fully nourish ourselves in order to show up and nourish others.
I have a great yoga teacher, Sat Siri, who says, “you can’t fill someone else’s cup if yours is empty. You must fill your own cup each day, then you can water those around you.”
But because so many of us have lost touch with our desires and with what this form of nourishment means for our bodies and our lives, we have to re-learn how to approach desire from a positive place, without judgement. And that is what The Art of Desire is - it's about re-discovering YOURSELF with full permission to explore what it is you want.
And because it is so foreign to many of us - when we re-establish our relationship with desire, it is often something that needs to be cultivated with care and compassion and with help - because it is something that is difficult to do alone. So I’m really honored to introduce to you a group experience called THE ART OF DESIRE: A Full Day Retreat For You To Discover Your Core Desired Feelings ...
THE DESIRE MAP, is a body of work by Danielle LaPorte ... and it's all about helping you get clear about how you want to FEEL ... because knowing how you want to feel is the most potent form of clarity you can have.
This philosophy of work can be referred to as many things: setting goals with soul, living in alignment with your desires, creating the life of your dreams ... but what I like about it is that it boils down to YOU living your life from a place of desire by taking your life into account with your lifestyle and your desires, and it creates holistic roadmap to help you get to where you want to be.
I believe in this body of work so deeply because it changed my life. It changed how I feel about myself, how I show up in the world, the way I get up in the morning, the way I choose to work and play and the way I continue to grow and radiate each day, through all of the simultaneously beautiful and the painful parts of life that make life LIFE.
I'm able to stay grounded and true to myself through all the ups and downs because I know HOW I WANT TO FEEL AND WHAT I NEED TO DO IN ORDER TO FEEL THAT WAY. My Core Desired Feelings are an anchor that lead me home, back to my inner guidance day after day ... and are also what I use to set goals ... so that I can constantly feel how I want to feel on my way to getting the goal.
So my question to you is: do you know how you want to feel? What will make you FEEL GOOD? Do you have any idea? Are there any words that pop up for you?
SOULFUL ... CONNECTED ... STRONG ... FREEDOM ... DIVINE ... RADIANT ... POWERFUL ... BEAUTY ... EXPANSIVE ... COURAGEOUS ... NOURISHED ... ABUNDANT ... LUMINOUS ... ?
In my experience of coaching hundreds of women, the three reasons women don't get to where they want to go is because they either set ridiculous unrealistic goals for themselves, they just wait and let life happen to them (and say, I'll do it after the holidays, after the New Year, after the kids are grown), or sadly, they have no idea what they actually want so they don't do anything to change their current circumstance, even if they are unhappy.
But you can't just hope that things will change or that your prince in shining armor will show up. You can’t just wait for the life you want because it won't just be handed to you - YOU HAVE TO CREATE IT. And the only way you can create the life you want and become the woman you want to be is by engaging your desire from a place of FEELING.
